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Hi, I have been living and working in Trondheim for nearly 3 years now. I have a Norwegian partner and have been learning the language, I get by but I am not "socially confident" in Norwegian. My partner is not very social, whereas I really like to get out and be with people fairly often. He has some friends, we socialise with them infrequently and I feel very included when we do, but they are very much his friends.

I have some colleagues who I know pretty well, but no friends out of the office. We do hang out outside of work, but it feels very much like friends of convenience rather than friends we would choose in other circumstances.

We're all international and that is pretty much the basis of our relationship. I am glad for them, but really feel the need for friends outside of the office who are met based on mutual interests etc. I think not speaking the language fluently is hindering me, but despite this I tried joining lots of clubs etc. People seem to have their friends and they don't really need anymore. I worry that I also come across as desperate It's getting to the point where despite loving my life here for all other reasons, I am thinking about leaving.

I don't know what I am asking for here either, I guess I am wondering if anyone else has felt like this before? Maybe suggestions of what I could do. I know I need to persevere with norwegian, but I feel so demotivated, I am not even sure that it would help me really. I should add, I think a lot of my work friends feel the same about the city, like they haven't quite fit in and we get into this spiral of complaining about not meeting people and how difficult learning the language is etc.

Destructive really but it bands us together! Have you tried facebook groups at all? I'm in Sweden and there is a group English speaking mums in Sweden that meet up in the main cities maybe you have something similar.